Begin Again novel Chapter 191

Eden was not lying when she said she couldn't cook, and Liam couldn't understand how she managed to ruin his chicken soup. It was too watery, too salty, and the meat was too mushy.

But he wolfed it down with a lot of enthusiasm.

"How is it?" She asked eagerly, their anger temporarily on hold while they filled their stomachs and prepared for a possible round two of their Battle Royale.

Liam stared glumly at his half-full bowl, thinking of the best way to tell her it's shit. But when he looked up and found her looking at him with those wondrous eyes of hers, he didn't have the heart to crush her spirit.

"It's great," he lied. "I love it."

And that was his biggest mistake. Eden was only too happy to dole out more of the soup. "Eat, have some more."

"Okay," Liam croaked as he forced himself to swallow it down.

They slipped into silence for a while as they both watched Aiden play with the PAW Patrol plushy they'd brought back from Forrest Creek, and Liam's anger sparked to life again when he thought about how many such simple evenings he'd missed out on.

Sure, he knew nothing about fatherhood, and he'd probably suck at it, but he would have liked to be given a choice. Eden had robbed him of that choice.

"Did you not have any faith in me at all as a father?" He asked, pushing his bowl away.

Her eyes now firmly on the soup she'd barely touched, Eden whispered, "that's not true,"

"I mean, why else would you choose to raise Aiden alone when I'm alive and well and more than capable of providing for you?"

"I told you—" She groaned in her hands, blowing out a frustrated sigh. "I thought you were married! I thought—"

"Even if that was the case, did you not think I deserved to know?" Liam roared at her, banging his fists on the table, startling their son. "Did you not think I'd give up everything for you and Aiden."

"That's exactly why I didn't tell you!" Eden screamed right back at him and shoved her bowl aside. "I didn't want you to give up anything. I didn't want to mess up your life."

"You are my life," Liam shook his head, his vision momentarily blurred by his tears. "There's nothing I wouldn't have done to be with you and my son. God, Eden, you are my heart, my hell, paradise. You are my home."

"I'm sorry."

"I missed out on your entire pregnancy. I wasn't there to massage your back, to soothe your feet when they ached, or hold your hair back while you puked from morning sickness. Did you even have morning sickness? I never had a chance to feel Aiden's first kick in your tummy! I didn't go with you on your first scan and follow up visits. Why would you take that away from me?"

"I didn't know you'd want any of it."

They were both in tears again now, but neither wanted to back away and give in, and Liam still hadn't said his piece. Every time he thought he was done, he would think of something else, and the now-familiar feelings of regret and heartache would crush him like a tsunami.

"Two years of his memories," he said sadly, looking at his son. "And I'm not even in one of them? Did you tell him about me?"

"He knows your scent," she blurted out.

Liam raised a questioning eyebrow and poured himself a glass of wine. The ruined chicken soup wasn't doing much to numb his shredded heart.

"I kept your shirt," she explained, her voice shaky with tears, was barely above a whisper. "I never washed it because I wanted him to know your scent. I wanted him to at least have something of yours."

"You make it sound like I died." He scoffed at her. "I was alive and well. And I was here, going crazy out of mind from needing you. And you were what, hiding in the Blue Mountains, raising my child like he doesn't have a father. What the fuck went through your head?"

And Aiden couldn't hold back his tears too any longer, he screamed his tiny guts out, and Eden scrambled out of her seat to soothe him.