Begin Again novel Chapter 74

Utterly astounded by her parents’ announcement Eden stared at them with complete shock etched on her face.

Weren't they too old to separate?

What did separate even mean?

"You mean like a divorce?" She asked in a strangely alien voice; there's no way this thin, trill sound belonged to her.

"Yes, honey," Erica reached for her hand to give her a reassuring squeeze.

Eden snatched it away before she could. In that awfully thin voice she barely recognised, she carried on with her questions, "but why? Why are you doing this?"

"We don't love each other," her Mom said calmly and dabbed her napkin on her lips before discarding it on the table beside her half-finished food.

Eden laughed. At least that's what she wanted to do. But it came out more like a snort. "Don't love each other? Of course, you do. You've been married for twenty-six years. If that isn't love, I don't know what is."

Sure, her parents were not shining examples of romance. But they were married for twenty-six years—two decades and then some.

Wasn't that love?

Didn't that count for something?

"Marriage doesn't always mean love, honey," Steve put down his fork long enough to clarify one of life's biggest mysteries and work out the economics of relationships for her. "Sometimes it's a necessary, mutually beneficial partnership. You both set your goals and decide how best you can meet them while satisfying the other party."

"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!" Eden yelled and pushed her glass away. "What the fuck does that even mean?"

"Mind the language, dear!" Erica gritted her teeth, throwing an anxious look over her shoulder.

Even when her marriage is on its dying breath, she still wanted to keep up appearances and hang on to her well-constructed illusion of a perfect family.

"What does this mean? What does it all mean? You fell out of love? Is that it?" Eden asked in a small voice, feeling a crushing sadness for all of them.

As cold as they were towards her, she believed they were in love with each other at least.

Their marriage, as old as she was, had given her hope that there were all kinds of love in the world, and they could last as long as the romances she saw in romcoms.

Her parents' solid marriage had given her hope that someday she'd find her own kind of love. It may not be a perfect love, but it would be lasting love like theirs.

But now—

"We haven't for a while," Steve said.

Eden fell silent for some time, trying to process the past few minutes. But nothing made sense; she felt completely blindsided. Like someone had pulled a rug from underneath her feet.

She desperately looked around the room, searching for someone—anyone—an adult to come and fix this mess for her.

But they were in a private room reserved for very important people like her parents who had heartbreaking news to share or some backdoor deals to make.

The only two adults in the room had decided to dismantle everything she'd believed in her whole life and turn her world upside down.

She took several, shaky breaths, trying to calm herself and hold on to the little bit of sanity she thought she still had. When that failed, she reached for her half-empty bottle of sparkling water and drained it, not bothering to empty it into a glass like a refined person raised by Erica would.

At last, feeling like she could handle more uncomfortable news, she turned to her parents again. "How long is a while?"

As if they were trying to decide if she can handle any more shocking revelations, they exchanged another telling look.

Steve shook his head, refusing to answer her question.

But Erica had more faith in her and her resilience to handle the bitter truth.

She picked up her glass, took a long, slow sip and announcec calmly, "since the very beginning to be honest. I fell pregnant. I wanted to go at it alone, but your father wanted to do the right thing. So we did."

"The right thing? For who?" Eden demanded.

"For you, sweetheart. You deserved to be in a loving home with both parents." Steve jumped in and wiped the sweat on his bald spot with his handkerchief. His two plates of pasta had warmed him up real good.

"No!" Eden shook her head. "I deserved to be in two loving homes with honest, happy parents. Twenty-six years of duty, of responsibility, of honour. But not a single one of love? Is that it?"

"It's a different kind of love, Edie!"

"No, Dad," she wagged an angry finger at him. "Love and duty are not the same things. Love is effortless. It's something you want and choose. You don't have a choice when it comes to duty, and your sense of honour shackles you to a lifetime of responsibility. What you and Mom had was duty. Not love. Don't confuse the two!"

"Eden, stop it!" Erica rolled her eyes. "You are acting like a child right now."

"A child with hopes and dreams," Eden shouted as she ripped her napkin from her lap and dumped it on the table. "And you have no idea how you've just shattered those dreams, Mom! Was everything a lie?"

All those memories, family holidays, trips abroad, birthday celebrations and endless milestones. Was it all a lie? Was any of it real?

"I'm sorry," Steve said.

"No, Dad, I'm the sorry one in all of this. I wish you hadn't done that. I wish you hadn't married Mom out of some misguided sense of duty."