Dear Ex-wife, Marry Me novel Chapter 1853

I had an epiphany, and it was about you. I'm so sorry, truly sorry. When you first took a shine to me, all I could think was that you were Abner's daughter, and I should despise you, I should resent you. I deliberately ignored you, spouted hurtful things. But at night, I couldn't sleep. I smoked like a chimney during that time, scared spitless that one day you'd learn the truth and how you'd react to me. I went to Nathan for pills twice, but after we got together, suddenly those pills just collected dust. I was terrified, Carol, scared out of my wits. I had nightmares of my mom interrogating me and my dad cussing me out. So I upped the dosage, trying to convince myself it was the meds talking, not my feelings for you.

You've got the pride of a rich girl, but I've got my pride too. How could I admit I'd fallen for my enemy's daughter? No matter how much your dad tried to make amends, to throw money at the problem, he was the reason my family fell apart. After all the heartache I've been through, how could I just give up over a girl named Carol? The night I decided to act, I smoked a pack and listened to some tunes. I never got the lyrics before, but then it hit me. What was it again?"

He paused for a half a second before he continued, each word deliberate: "Pride often drags us along, making love take twisted roads. Now I get it, really. Don't leave me, I'm begging you. I love you so much it hurts. Without you, I can't go on. Didn't you say you wanted someone who would love you passionately? That's me. So please, give me a chance."

After he finished speaking, he slowly let go of Carol's hand, his voice hoarse: "Did you get all that?"

Carol didn't speak, her fingertips trembling slightly.

She had intended to witness his humiliation, but now the place where he held her hand ached terribly.

The pain spread throughout her body.

She heard him add one more thing.

"I've been awful to you. After the Miller family’s disaster, I couldn't even look you in the eyes, afraid of seeing contempt. I was self-destructive, thinking if you were going to hate me, then let it be with your whole heart, so you'd never forget me. How perfect that would be."

Carol flinched and her phone fell onto the hospital bed.

He picked it up thoughtfully and placed it back in her palm.

"That's all I wanted to say."

With that, he leaned back against the pillows and fell asleep.

Carol blinked, and if it wasn't for the recording still running on her phone, she'd think this had all been a dream.

She looked down and paused the recording.

Ten minutes later, the nurse came in to check on him, sounding worried.

"His fever's up again. You could use some rubbing alcohol to wipe him down, try to reduce the fever. We've tried everything else, but it just won't break."

The nurse called out a few times, not getting a response from Carol.

Curious, she turned to look and found Carol's eyes swollen with tears.