The abbess asked Maria the same question that she had asked before Maria decided to shave her hair off and become a nun. And her answer remained the same. "Yes."
"In order to fully let go of your mortal life, you need not forgive others, you need to forgive yourself. Based on the Buddhist scriptures, you will never feel at peace with yourself unless you let go of your worldly obsessions. A butler can become a Buddha after laying down his knife. In reality, what he has put down is not the knife, but the hand holding the knife. What you must achieve is not to be a Buddha, but to become the best version of yourself."
Maria didn't know what to say.
'To be the best version of myself, huh?' She had led herself to believe that her life was perfect if James hadn't come to disturb her.
After leaving that abbess' place, Maria went to look for Lucille instead of going back to her own room.
Hesitantly, Lucille refused Maria's request to stay with her. Maria didn't persuade her anymore, and went to look for the other nuns.
However, everyone else refused her.
Maria wasn't sure how James managed to do this, but the details didn't matter. She knew that this was probably his scheme.
The moment she returned to her room, she found James washing his face and brushing his teeth, and
Coy was doing the same thing by his side.
Maria sat back at her table, and continued transcribing the Heart Sutra in silence, doing her best to calm herself down.
Before long, it was time to go to bed. The nunnery was quiet, save for Coy's exuberant laughter. This was the first time in his life that his father was sleeping next to him for the night. He was so excited that he couldn't fall asleep.
James was wearing luxurious silk pajamas, and it didn't fit the place. Coy crawled under James' quilt despite the fact that Maria was against it.
The bed that had been prepared for James wasn't that big, but it was enough to accommodate the father and son.
Upon seeing them, Maria didn't say anything more and just went to sleep alone.
After turning off the light, James held Coy tightly in his arms.
Under the dark night, the three of them closed their eyes.
"Dad, tell me a story!" said Coy.
"What story would you like to hear?"
"Do you know any stories about lions?"
After a moment of contemplation, James said, "I'll tell you a story that I once told your brother."
"Okay!"
In a soft, soothing voice, James began to narrate. "One day, a lion was sleeping in the forest, a little seed fell from the tree. And since the seed fell on the lion's tail, it begged the lion to wag its tail..."
The sound of his voice made Maria annoyed. She tossed and turned several times, and yet she still couldn't sleep.
Meanwhile, Coy had fallen asleep before James could even finish his story.
After a long while, he quietly got up from his bed and came to Maria's side of the bed.
She heard him moving, but she ignored him and pretended to be asleep.
Regardless whether she was asleep or not, James went to her bed and embraced her. Despite the darkness of the room, he managed to kiss her lips accurately.
Maria tried her best to prevent herself from having a mental breakdown. She could no longer pretend to be asleep, and started struggling from under his body.
"Mia, I just want to hug you. If you keep resisting like that, I won't be able to control myself," he whispered.
Maria was at a loss for words. James was becoming more and more shameless by the minute. Not only was he hugging her, he was also kissing her.
James didn't want to annoy her, so after he kissed her, he just held her in his arms and said, "Go to sleep."
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