The Glimpse of My Past novel Chapter 7

Diane’s P.O.V.

He made a series of deep thrusts and later on, all I could feel was him, stretching my nerves while pleasingly stabbing my body. My tears kept on rolling that I couldn’t control them. What he was doing kept on shaking my whole being and cruelly ending my dreams.

He continued pounding on top of me while letting out a few moans of satisfaction and relief. I didn’t want to hear him with my eyes closed and my head slouched. I couldn’t look at him overpowering with lust even though the surrounding was so dark. I had been trapped under his bulky body too many times. His pleasure increased and so his grip on me, making him reach the peak of his desire.

It really hurts me physically, emotionally, and mentally. I was totally drained. I guessed it would ruin my entire life. After this, I would never want to live again. I would never look to the future the same way again.

I opened my eyes, and he was still ravaging my body. I couldn’t stop myself from crying, as my brown orbs were fixed on the ceiling I could not even see. As my virginity tore apart, he released something inside me while still thrusting non-stop. I didn’t have a choice, what happened would surely leave me a horrible mark—one that could traumatize my past. A dark mark that would not be easily gone. With his every thrust, I continued to feel less of a woman.

Now, I left with nothing. In just an instant, I lost my honor, purity, and dignity to a rapist. In just a matter of seconds, my future was ruined.

I thought my suffering was over, but it was not. Although he untied my wrists from the headboard of the bed, I could feel nothing—my whole body seemed to be numb and disoriented. It came to a point where I no longer cared about what he would do to me next. That it would be better if he would just kill me so that this torture could finally end.

He repeatedly claimed my body that night as if he was not getting tired of it. When he got enough, he was panting while resting on top of me. He waited for his breathing to become steady before he laid his body beside me, hugged me so tight like I was a piece of his possession until he fell asleep.

Everything hurts now. Every damn little thing. It seemed like my body didn’t belong to me anymore. Long after my tears had dried and my lacerations put me into tatters, I no longer yearned to see the dawn.

Quickly dragging myself away from the bed, I was out of breath as if I ran a thousand miles. That caused my whole body to profusely sweat. As I heaved a deep sigh of relief, I had released all the stiffness lurking inside my chest due to unfathomable nervousness.

“Oh! Thank, God. It was just a dream again!” I muttered while sullenly rubbing my forehead.

I had been dreaming about that weird scenario for two years already. With so many explicit details, everything seemed to be true like it happened in real-life. It was the same nightmare that I did not know, nor comprehend, what was the real connection with me.

Our mother was kind and understanding, but when I told her once about this kind of dream, she ended up scolding me. She suspected me of imagining lascivious acts and even accused me that I might have already leveled up my performance in the club.

She also blamed me for allegedly reading pocketbooks related to sex and watching movies that contain pornography! I would end up smiling while convincing her that I would never do those kinds of things. Mom was nice, but sometimes, she was overreacting.

So, even that nightmare would visit me a few more times, my mouth was zipped as I would not speak about it… but it doesn’t mean that it wasn’t affecting me.

There was no single day that I wasn’t thinking about that dream. It was clear, but at the same time, vague. The scenes were always like that, and nothing changed even from the start. That dream would always make me question myself about a lot of things, like…