Alpha Lucias' Banished Luna novel Chapter 1

~Emilina POV~

“I, Lucias Rutherford reject to accept Emilina Winter as my fated mate.”

“I don’t want you Emilina. Just think everything we had in the past is just an illusion.”

“Don’t ever let me see your face again. I fucking hate you”

“I never loved you!”

My eyes snapped open, I sat up on the bed swiftly, clutching the bedsheet tightly. I’m sweating. My heart hammered inside of my chest with the burning pain which I would never be able to forget. It didn’t take much time for me to realize that it was still midnight.

I glanced out of the window of my room to see the heavy rain outside. It’s been raining rapidly for a few days already. While I stared at the rain, my mind pulled me to the nightmare I just saw. I felt my eyes filling with tears. Then those tears slipped out of my eyes. As always, I’m crying… I’m crying my heart out once again.

It’s been three years. Three years have passed and I’m still seeing him in my dreams. I still can’t forget him although I knew he had completely forgotten about me and moved on with his life as if I was never there beside him but why is it so hard for me? Why is it so painful? I think I still can’t force my heart to reduce the love I have for him. I just can’t undo the love which was dangerously deep and unbreakable. He’s the man who let me go through the most painful thing in this world along with the most ruthless humiliation.

Isn’t it funny to get rejected by your mate the day after your wedding? The very first morning I woke up in his bed, I was heatlessly rejected before I could even think about what was happening. That scar still remains in my heart and still haunts me every night in my dreams. Never have I thought he would do something like that to me. Wasn’t he happy when I walked through the aisle to him? He looked happy and he was happy… I felt it… but…

A loud thunder roared outside pulling me from my thoughts, which I was glad for. I covered my face with my palms shaking my head. It hurts… it is just suffocating whenever I recall him. I wiped off my tears and gazed at the figure sleeping soundly next to me. The hair… the face and the eyes… every single feature of this little guy resembled Lucias. This is the main reason why I cannot forget about Lucias.

How can I ever forget or ignore when his son is here? I laid on the bed again facing my son who’s sleeping so soundly. There was a mixture of both happiness and sadness in my heart when I looked at this little handsome face. I’m happy that I gave birth to him and at the same time, It stabbed my heart to face the reality that my son will never have his father. I stroked his silky black hair without moving my eyes from him.

Three years… so many things happened and I’m still here after waking up from the same nightmare I see every night and looking at my sleeping son while my whole soul questioned him why his father rejected me out of the blue.

Enduring the heart tearing pain in me, I shut my eyes wanting to fall asleep again. I don’t want to wake up every night seeing the man who hurt me the most in my dreams. I’m so exhausted from suffering for three years. I spent almost eight months carrying his son and that period was painful.

How can it not be painful when I was carrying the child of the most powerful alpha blood? Most importantly, when the child’s gender is male? None of those things were easy for me. He just completely destroyed my life. Whatever his reason is, I don’t think I will ever bring myself to forgive him even though I still love him insanely.

‘Sleep now… just sleep. Thinking about him would give you nothing but pain and a sleepless night.’

My wolf’s voice was broken when she muttered. I hear her voice in my head. Not only me, but also she’s suffering from what happened to us. She never thought her mate would do that to her, so am I. I wiped my tears and forced myself to sleep without thinking more. Thinking about him won’t help me. But I want to meet him one day…