Alpha Lucias' Banished Luna novel Chapter 3

“Emily? You okay?”

As soon as I opened my eyes I was greeted with Jerral’s gentle voice. My eyes fell on him instantly as I confirmed I’m in a safe place. I felt so bad… I just felt so bad for myself and I felt pity. I forced a smile and nodded at him as answer to his question before I tried to sit up on the bed after realizing that it’s not the night anymore. It’s morning. Jerral helped me to sit up on the bed and he took the water glass from the nightstand and let me drink it. I drank the whole glass and looked at his questions filled face.

“What happened Emily?”

His question made my heart shudder. What happened? The scariest thing that could happen in my life happened all of sudden and I’m hurt again. I clutched the bed sheet tightly and closed my eyes. The moment I closed my eyes my whole mind was suppressed by Lucias’s face. The way he stared at me with no emotions in his face. The way he let another woman hold him like that. Not only that he’s married. An instant pain spread through my chest like a lighting in the sky. It hurts… it hurts to death…

“I… it was him… it was Lucias Rutherford.” I mumbled hating the idea of lying to Jerral. I don’t want to lie to him anymore. He asked me about the father of Luan a few times but I never told him it was Lucias. I never wanted to talk about Lucias with anyone since he is the darkest scar in my heart. The scar that I never deserved.

“What do you mean? Alpha Lucias…” He sounded confused but soon his voice turned dead as he fell into a deadly silence. He must have understood what I meant. I chewed my lower lip feeling terrible. My chest is in pain already while my heart thumped faster adding more pain to me.

“Is… Is he Luan’s father? Lucias Rutherford?” I shut my eyes again. I hate to accept this but yes… he is the father.

“How come?” Jerral sat on the bed near me looking into my eyes with a serious look.

“It was me who he married and then he threw away after one night. And Luan is the unexpected result of that night.” Why do I still have to hide? I’ve hid this truth from everyone around me until now but I just can’t continue this anymore. Not after I met Lucias again. If I need to get away with everything I will have to have Jerral’s support but for that, I must not keep secrets. I should tell him the truth.

“Emily… why did you never tell me about this?” his eyes became worried as he moved his hand touching my face. He caressed my cheeks gently and muttered. His gentleness broke my heart because I never wanted another man to be gentle towards me like this, all I wanted was Lucias to be like this. But he brutally broke me. I lowered my eyes, moving away from his touch because I felt guilty. I just feel guilty to receive this gentleness when I clearly know that I have no feelings for him.

“How can I tell? How can I just tell someone the most humiliating thing that happened to me?” Whenever I remember the day he completely stopped things between us by rejecting me, it made me feel so insulted and humiliated. Why couldn’t he just reject me before we get married and spend our wedding night? The wedding shouldn’t have happened in the first place.

“Now he saw you last night… what are you going to do about it?” I sighed.

What am I going to do now? I don’t want Lucias to find out about Luan. I just simply hate it. I can be sure that if he ever finds out about my baby, he would definitely snatch him from me. The fear curled up in my chest making my lips quivered. The fear is controlling me and I have no idea about how to face the future.

“I don’t want him to know about Luan. I just want to keep him out of our lives.” Jerral’s gaze on me deepened. His jaws clenched and he simply stared at me without letting a word out. I can understand this. He wants to help me so badly but I know he’s just thinking twice about it because of Lucias. How can someone go against Lucias? Lucias is the leader of the council of all Alphas. Even Jerral has to kneel in front of him.

“Do you want me to tell Luan is my child if alpha Lucias ever comes to find you?” Will Lucias ever believe? He’s a sharp witted man and he can separate the lie and truth effortlessly. I don’t want Jerral to face problems because of me. Giving me shelter and helping me until now is already enough. I shouldn’t make his life more tough.

“No. The things you are doing for us is enough. Jerral… I just… want to leave. I will be so happy if I can leave today. I don’t mind how far it is as long as Lucias won’t find me until Luan becomes older.” I said honestly.

I just want to disappear somewhere no one will find me and my son. My heart still wants to believe that Lucias will accept me and my son but my brain doesn’t want to believe it after seeing him with another woman. He’s already married to someone else which means that we will never have even a tiny chance together.

“How can you just go somewhere far away and live without any protection? You are alone with a two and half year old, how can you even continue living?” His questions make sense. This will be so hard for me but what should I do?