Where We Belong novel (Ava and Blaze) Book 1 novel Chapter 146

Chapter 146

He was gone.....

I knew from the minute I opened my eyes he had left me. Curling into a ball the silent tears streamed down my face. If he loved me as much as he said he did then why did he leave?

I'm protecting you...

His words were circling my mind. It hurt so much because this time I knew he meant it. He wasn't coming back, I wasn't going to see him again. Hearing the vibration I grabbed my phone thinking it would be him but my heart sank when my dads name flashed across the screen. Ignoring it I turned my phone off and crawled back into bed.

Everyone would know he had left. Hours had passed and I had done nothing but stare at the ceiling in my bedroom. It wasn't until the rattle at my front door became louder and louder that I decided to drag my ass out of bed and see who the hell it was.

"What?" I yelled pulling the door open. Moving to the side I let him in. Closing the door behind me I wasn't in the mood to see anyone today. "Are you just going to stand there and stare at me?" Putting some water in the kettle I grabbed two mugs.

"Do you know?" Was his first question.

"Don't care" Was my response. Tough act was the only way I could see my self getting through this.

"Ava" He sighed

"He left me Jared and for that reason he can go fuck himself". Pouring the water into the cups I passed one to him. "Why are you here?".

"Just checking in" He shrugged taking a sip of his coffee.

"Well you don't have to do that anymore. You can stay and finish your coffee then show yourself out. I'm going back to bed".

"Ava don't do this don't shut everyone out because he's not here".

Stopping at his words I felt my shoulders sag. Jared was like my brother but right now I couldn't face anyone especially someone that reminded me so much of Blaze. "Please just leave me alone I don't want to see anyone and please tell my dad the same". Not giving him a chance to reply I headed back to my bedroom.

1 month later...

I was rushed off my feet. Collapsing into the sofa in my office I threw my arm over my eyes. The day he left was the day my world fell apart. Not once did he try to contact me and the number I had for him was no longer in use. I threw myself back into work after two weeks of sulking and avoiding every one and everything.

I still hadn't built up the courage to go back to the clubhouse, still couldn't face everyone there. I had spoke to my mom and that was it.

My mind would always wander to him. He was all I could think about. Where was he? Was he alive? I knew I needed to try and move on but truth be told I didn't want to. Our relationship at times was poison but he was my guy, the only guy I ever loved the one I wanted to be with and now he wasn't mine anymore he was just gone. I was putting on a brave face whenever I was around anyone. No one had to know that I cried myself to sleep most nights heck that was when I finally managed to sleep. For some reason the nightmares had come back. I was waking up screaming and in a puddle of my own sweat.

The knock on my office door caused a sigh to slip past my lips. I was never in the mood for company these days, I barely held a conversation more than I need too. Sitting up I moved to behind my desk and pulled some files in front of me.

"Come in" I called not bothering to look up from the file I wasn't interested in. Placed in front of me was a Starbucks cup.

Jared!!

"Ava" He grunted taking a seat in front of me.

Sighing I took the coffee and sat back in my chair. "What are you doing here Jared?" I had disconnected from everyone. My relationship with Jared wasn't the same anymore and yes that was my fault. At this point in my life I wasn't interested in anything but getting myself back on my feet.

"I haven't seen or heard from you in a month and that's all you have to say to me?" He asked and instantly I felt the guilt in the pit of my stomach. "I never pegged you for someone who would turn their back on family".

Now he had my attention.

"Excuse me?"

"You know what I'm talking about Ava" He snapped getting to his feet. "Fuck knows why he left because he's just as miserable and ruthless as ever".

"You've spoke with him?" I whispered not caring about anything else he said.