Planned Baby novel Chapter 61

I feel so empty.

Without My Quinn, my life is so empty.

Why did I say those things to her? Why did I hurt my Quinn?

It’s been a week since the new semester started. I thought that during the semester break, I was successful in fooling myself that I did the right decision.

But who am I kidding? I was afraid to lose her that is why I told her that I only see her as a friend. I want us to last that is why I want us to remain as friends. And now, I lost her forever.

Can I really carry on my life without her?

“Call her,” Quen said when I call him on the phone and told him about what happened.

Quen is my only best friend. I always tell him everything that is happening to me here in the country.

Quen was in America to study. My sister is with him. My sister chose to study in the same university as him because she likes him. But my best friend only saw her as a friend, and he was in love with someone else.

“She will probably ignore my call,” I told Quen.

“Then go to her place. You know where he lives right?”

I nodded even though he can’t see me. “Yes.”

“There’s no problem them. Go to her place and apologize. Confess your real feelings for her then propose to her.” Quen said like it was so easy to do.

I hurt him big time. It won’t be easy for her to believe me. I am scared that he might reject me after I confess everything to her because of what I did to her. For sure she hates me to death now.

In the end, I find myself dialing my Quinn’s number. My forehead creased when I was not able to reach her number.

Did she block me? Or did she change her number?

I started to get panic. But then I remember Quen’s advice. I hurriedly went to my car and started to drive to my Quinn’s house. I feel like if I don’t go to her now, I will really lose her completely. And I will never let that happen.

My shoulder fell when I found out that my Quinn and her family had already moved out. She really hates me. My Quinn hates me. What am I going to do now?

I went last week to the university she was supposed to transfer to and I found out that she cancel her transfer there.

I was so lost for the past months. I didn't know what to do. All I know is, my Quinn doesn’t want me in her life anymore. She completely cut me in her life. I don't have any means to reach her. She hates me that much, to the point that she made sure that I will not be able to locate her.

The semester ended and I still can’t find my Quinn.

Where are you now my Quinn? I miss you so much. Please, come back to me. I will accept any punishment you want to give me but don’t disappear from my life forever. I don’t think I can survive in this life without you.

In desperation of finding my Quinn, I hire a private investigator to look for her when the new semester started. And I know that I made the right decision because he was able to find my Quinn in just a month.

When I finally found out where he chose to study, I immediately went to her university to look for her.

I saw my Quinn coming out from her university with a group of people. It might be her classmates or friends. Most of them were boys. I felt jealous when I saw a guy approaching her, making her laugh.

They went to what the student called “walls of Intramuros” to eat. I saw how close she is to that guy.

My heart started to harden. I am not ready yet to see her with another guy. Why the hell did I think that I want us to be just friends?! I can’t bear to see her being close to another guy.

Maybe I was not able to realize it before because I was the only guy she was close with. But seeing her now, I know that my choices before were full of rubbish and stupid decision.

I decided to just go home. I don’t think I have the strength to face her.

The next day, I decided to go to my Quinn’s house. I got the address from my investigator.

Their new house has the same feel as their previous house. Maybe this is the kind of style that her parents prefer. I also found out that this house is one of their property. This is one of the first properties they both when their business started to grow.

I saw my Quinn with her parents taking a walk. She looks happy and contented with her life right now. It seems like I don’t have a place with her anymore.

It was different from what I was going through in past semesters. How can she be this happy while I feel miserable when I lost her?

Is her love for me is not strong compared to mine that is why she can move on just like that?

Does she really love me?

I don't know why, but I found myself following them. I don't see any sadness in her eyes. It was full of happiness and contentment.

I find my tears pouring. I know it sounds so shallow but I am really hurt by the fact that she can easily move on in her life.

I know that I should be happy for her because regardless of what I did to her, she was able to move forward but I am not.

In the back of my mind, I want to see her a bit sad because I was not in her life anymore. I want to longingness in he eyes but I found none.

I was about to go back to my pad when I saw them entering their house when someone called me.

“Ulysses?”

I froze. It was a woman’s voice but I know it's not my Quinn. I slowly turn around to face the person who called me.